[Man, if this conversation is strained, comparative to all the other exchanges that he's had with Eren... that kind of says something. He crosses his arms, remembering that this was the same person who teased death in France and kicked his ass out onto the Coelacanth back on BASE.
He didn't know Eren had died, but if he did know, that would make him incredibly sad. Ryuji thinks he can save all his friends, all the time. Even when it's out of his hands.
The door closes behind him, and he looks him over once, twice... just to make sure there wasn't anything on him that looked or felt different than before. Ryuji also wasn't entirely convinced that spiders can't do the whole
Body... snatcher thing...]
You know me. Kickin' ass. Takin' names. Really can't complain- okay, what the hell is goin' on with you?
[ So he noticed. Eren makes a somewhat pained expression before answering. ]
Things haven't been going my way for quite some time. I'm starting to think they never will. [ Eren takes a seat wherever he can, giving the impression that he's really rather exhausted. ] But who knows. I've just gotta keep going.
[ A slight tilt of his head. His eye peeks up at Ryuji with just the faintest glimmer of curiosity. ]
Sakamoto, tell me: was your world a peaceful place? A good number here, at least - [ Himself excluded. ] Seem to have led lives free from conflict the kind we now face every day.
[Ryuji visually slumps a little bit when Eren starts opening up to him. He knows what that's like. His entire personality is built on top of the just keep going mindset, a sheer force of will to just not let... every little thing get him tripped up along the way. And it gets harder when the rocks you stumble upon just get larger, and larger.]
You gotta keep going. It's the only thing you can do.
[He sits on the edge of his bed, leaning forward and opposing from Eren, who seems to have gotten himself a chair.]
Yes, and no. I don't think that peace truly exists. At any second back home, entire country's coulda gone to war. My nation's still occupied by foreign troops. There's a dictator right next door to us. It's kinda hard to say that anything's really shaped up to be... like, completely without struggle, you know?
[He sighs.]
And then there are the wars people fight every day within themselves. Even when there's no impending power struggle politically, everyone's just tryin' to get by. Tryin' to be heard, loved. Who knows if we were ever meant to be a chill race.
[It doesn't match up against endless conflict with Titans, that's for sure. But he's starting to get some of Eren's fatigue.]
[ You don't need to tell him twice. He's like a car that's only ever had one gear: drive.
Though it's a little familiar to him by now, he listens intently, hanging on every word and establishing an image of Ryuji's homeland. He knows it must be Japan - enough study of "Earth" on BASE had taught him that much, at least. And the situation he speaks of resonates with him in an oddly particular way. ]
I couldn't care less whether I'm acknowledged or - loved. [ An odd pause there. He's rarely ever said that last word. ] And political power doesn't matter much to me either. I only ever wanted the freedom to live my life without the threat of death looming over me.
[ Is there a window in the room? If there is, he leans back and somberly looks out of it. ]
Yes, death. [ He leans forward and rests his elbows arms on his knees. ] Since before I was born, my homeland was threatened by an onslaught of beasts. There was never a safe moment within those walls we called home.
It's not strange... it's just... More formal? I guess.
Yeah, that's where I'm goin' with this. You got a little bit of stiffness in ya. Kinda like you need someone to do one of those chiropractor alignments on your back and then you'll wake up, talkin' like me, or something.
[Ryuji smiles softly. He knows that Eren probably... has been through something and needs a friend to talk to, so he'll happily fill that role. Lighten the mood, keep it simple. It's what he's good for.]
I'm not letting anyone near my back. One wrong crack and I could die. [ He says this like it's the most rational conclusion to come to. Chiropractors can burn in Hell, basically. ] To me, talking like this is just natural. It'll come to you, I'm sure.
[ He leans back, groaning under his breath like a codgy old man. ]
What... that's not what I meant at all, dude. A crack? [He grimaces at Eren for a moment, before---] Unless you're talkin' about your ass, I guess. That definitely has a crack in it.
[God, you're gross, Ryuji.]
... You're not that much older than me, dude. The hobo look only goes so far to hide that.
[ Eren swivels his head around just enough to stare at his behind for a moment. He wouldn't be so sure about that crack. There's not enough ass there to make one. Anyway - ]
You must be - what, fifteen? Going on sixteen? [ He lowers his eye. ] It's about that time I started getting the same look in my eyes that you do now.
[It's a weird realization to come to pass that his birthday's probably already happened since joining COST. If he counts in his head, it's been just the right amount of time for him to have completely missed it.]
It might not be obvious since you're fresh out of the shower, but you've become rather exhausted. [ With two of his fingers, he touches the area under his eye. ] And it's most apparent around your eyes.
[ He brings his hand off his face and stares at it for a good few seconds before sighing. ]
Not that it matters much, but I'm two years your elder. [ He tilts his head. Most would say the difference between a teenager and an adult is rather significant. He doesn't know a way to say that to Ryuji that doesn't come off as dickish. ] What do you think of that?
Edited 2018-06-23 17:22 (UTC)
hm no wonder why your k/d ratio was off... since this is killing me rn
[Wait... what? He has? Ryuji had no idea that it was apparent. Sure, he knew that Mordred's strain on his energies was a typical, everyday sort of presence, but he also hadn't noticed anything about himself looking more tired, more embittered against the role he was serving in COST.
He tries to play it off. People shouldn't worry about him. He can handle himself until his body gives out. That's how Ryuji's always dealt with this.]
Hm? Nah, it's just this place. Don't worry about it. Spiders kinda give me the creeps.
[It's probably somewhat transparent. Ryuji doesn't know what Eren's aiming for here, but there's an air of worry in there that he can't really decipher. Blind to that concept alone, he probably doesn't know that the implication is that... day by day, Ryuji is slowly becoming more hardened, more like Eren and less like the boy he was when he landed in France.
His emotions seem more in tune, too. 6 months ago, he'd probably go off on Eren, telling him that he was being a dick by implying the nature of their differences. By all accounts, Eren was an adult whereas Ryuji was still somewhere in the middle, but getting there steadily as each campaign drove on. World War I didn't really help with that either.]
Hm? Yeah, I mean... hatachi is the rite of passage in my home world anyway. When you turn 20, you're considered a full fledged adult. [He uses the towel around his neck to dry his hair a little more.] I don't think anything of it? It's just the way it is, dude.
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no subject
He didn't know Eren had died, but if he did know, that would make him incredibly sad. Ryuji thinks he can save all his friends, all the time. Even when it's out of his hands.
The door closes behind him, and he looks him over once, twice... just to make sure there wasn't anything on him that looked or felt different than before. Ryuji also wasn't entirely convinced that spiders can't do the whole
Body... snatcher thing...]
You know me. Kickin' ass. Takin' names. Really can't complain- okay, what the hell is goin' on with you?
no subject
Things haven't been going my way for quite some time. I'm starting to think they never will. [ Eren takes a seat wherever he can, giving the impression that he's really rather exhausted. ] But who knows. I've just gotta keep going.
[ A slight tilt of his head. His eye peeks up at Ryuji with just the faintest glimmer of curiosity. ]
Sakamoto, tell me: was your world a peaceful place? A good number here, at least - [ Himself excluded. ] Seem to have led lives free from conflict the kind we now face every day.
no subject
You gotta keep going. It's the only thing you can do.
[He sits on the edge of his bed, leaning forward and opposing from Eren, who seems to have gotten himself a chair.]
Yes, and no. I don't think that peace truly exists. At any second back home, entire country's coulda gone to war. My nation's still occupied by foreign troops. There's a dictator right next door to us. It's kinda hard to say that anything's really shaped up to be... like, completely without struggle, you know?
[He sighs.]
And then there are the wars people fight every day within themselves. Even when there's no impending power struggle politically, everyone's just tryin' to get by. Tryin' to be heard, loved. Who knows if we were ever meant to be a chill race.
[It doesn't match up against endless conflict with Titans, that's for sure. But he's starting to get some of Eren's fatigue.]
But it ain't all that bad.
no subject
Though it's a little familiar to him by now, he listens intently, hanging on every word and establishing an image of Ryuji's homeland. He knows it must be Japan - enough study of "Earth" on BASE had taught him that much, at least. And the situation he speaks of resonates with him in an oddly particular way. ]
I couldn't care less whether I'm acknowledged or - loved. [ An odd pause there. He's rarely ever said that last word. ] And political power doesn't matter much to me either. I only ever wanted the freedom to live my life without the threat of death looming over me.
[ Is there a window in the room? If there is, he leans back and somberly looks out of it. ]
Look where that's got me.
no subject
Death?
no subject
Yes, death. [ He leans forward and rests his elbows arms on his knees. ] Since before I was born, my homeland was threatened by an onslaught of beasts. There was never a safe moment within those walls we called home.
no subject
[Fuckin' rude.]
no subject
Let's go with that. [ He rubs his chin with his thumb and goes into that :thinking: pose. ] Do I really speak so strangely?
no subject
It's not strange... it's just... More formal? I guess.
Yeah, that's where I'm goin' with this. You got a little bit of stiffness in ya. Kinda like you need someone to do one of those chiropractor alignments on your back and then you'll wake up, talkin' like me, or something.
[Ryuji smiles softly. He knows that Eren probably... has been through something and needs a friend to talk to, so he'll happily fill that role. Lighten the mood, keep it simple. It's what he's good for.]
no subject
I'm not letting anyone near my back. One wrong crack and I could die. [ He says this like it's the most rational conclusion to come to. Chiropractors can burn in Hell, basically. ] To me, talking like this is just natural. It'll come to you, I'm sure.
[ He leans back, groaning under his breath like a codgy old man. ]
When you're older.
no subject
Pay no mind to the man behind the curtain, IVAN.]
What... that's not what I meant at all, dude. A crack? [He grimaces at Eren for a moment, before---] Unless you're talkin' about your ass, I guess. That definitely has a crack in it.
[God, you're gross, Ryuji.]
... You're not that much older than me, dude. The hobo look only goes so far to hide that.
no subject
You must be - what, fifteen? Going on sixteen? [ He lowers his eye. ] It's about that time I started getting the same look in my eyes that you do now.
no subject
Look in your eyes?
[What does that even mean, man?]
I'm 18, by the way.
I wrote this as we were doing competitive
[ He brings his hand off his face and stares at it for a good few seconds before sighing. ]
Not that it matters much, but I'm two years your elder. [ He tilts his head. Most would say the difference between a teenager and an adult is rather significant. He doesn't know a way to say that to Ryuji that doesn't come off as dickish. ] What do you think of that?
hm no wonder why your k/d ratio was off... since this is killing me rn
He tries to play it off. People shouldn't worry about him. He can handle himself until his body gives out. That's how Ryuji's always dealt with this.]
Hm? Nah, it's just this place. Don't worry about it. Spiders kinda give me the creeps.
[It's probably somewhat transparent. Ryuji doesn't know what Eren's aiming for here, but there's an air of worry in there that he can't really decipher. Blind to that concept alone, he probably doesn't know that the implication is that... day by day, Ryuji is slowly becoming more hardened, more like Eren and less like the boy he was when he landed in France.
His emotions seem more in tune, too. 6 months ago, he'd probably go off on Eren, telling him that he was being a dick by implying the nature of their differences. By all accounts, Eren was an adult whereas Ryuji was still somewhere in the middle, but getting there steadily as each campaign drove on. World War I didn't really help with that either.]
Hm? Yeah, I mean... hatachi is the rite of passage in my home world anyway. When you turn 20, you're considered a full fledged adult. [He uses the towel around his neck to dry his hair a little more.] I don't think anything of it? It's just the way it is, dude.